We have a boy.
We have a dog.
That’s about where the connection ends… mostly.
Alex is the in-house animal whisperer. Pretty much, when we need for the dog and/or cat to behave a certain way, we open with, “Alex! Can you get the cat/dog to…..” She has always had a connection with our animals.
Abby… only connects with reptiles, I’m pretty sure she speaks parseltongue… (ok, no she doesn’t. It’s not even a real thing – I am currently immersed in the Harry Potter books and as such, I’ve mentioned Abby/parseltongue at least thrice today. Parseltongue is the ability to converse with snakes and is most commonly associated with the Dark Lord… hahaha if any REAL person could speak parseltongue, it’d be that girl). But in the non-wizarding realm, Abby has no real connection to the animals – as a matter of fact, BrettFavre (the cat not the man) takes a swipe at her frequently when she breezes by him. ‘Course right now he’s curled up on her, purring….
Cal couldn’t care less about the animals. He… is me – he neither loves them nor loathes them. They are… that’s it. It’s odd because he’s such a lover, I really expected a deeper relationship. Brownie (the dog) has taken to sleeping in Cal’s room – right beside his bed. It’s pretty cute, it’d be unbearably cute if Cal had any affection for the dog whatsoever. Let me say again, he doesn’t DISLIKE Brownie, he just doesn’t give her too much thought (unless she’s hurt or not feeling well, etc.). Brownie has, unfortunately, always smelled bad (only to find out a decade later – German Shepherds are one of the worst smelling dog breeds :/ ) and always had nauseating breath (completely our fault) and she has always, ALWAYS, thought she was a lap dog. These traits are not endearing. Cal and I find them especially not endearing.
Of course – she’s hanging on well past her life expectancy (after all, there’s more undercoat to spread). It seems Shepherds are expected to live 7 to 10 years, Brownie will soon be 12. She has very little energy left – except to cram her face into my face and breath that stank-ass breath on me… Every time Alex looks at her, Brownie is in the middle of a breath – we are literally watching for her to stop breathing – and Alex starts to panic if her stomach doesn’t rise or fall immediately. The dog seems extremely happy and content at this point but we are bracing ourselves for the time her stomach doesn’t rise again, or worse yet, when we have to make a decision…
Anyway, back to Cal and Brownie. Years ago… YEARRRRS ago – I think Cal had to be in the 2-year old range; I got home from work to find Alex (4) and Cal outside with our sitter (Annie, I was going to write ‘nanny’ but I didn’t want to sound all high falutin… you still have your own computer login here, clearly more than a “sitter”). Annie left and I looked to Alex and Cal and said, “I’m running upstairs to change clothes – I will be right back down.” I had shorts and a t-shirt laying on the bed and was basically a round curtain and some glitter away from being that lady at the circus who changes outfits – I couldn’t have been upstairs for more than 2? 3? minutes, if that. I got back outside to – no Calvin.
I was asking Alex where he was, screaming – SCREAMING – his name, frantically looking around the house (we live on a moderately busy road… I shudder to even imagine………). I called my dad, “I’VE LOST CALVIN HE’S NOWHERE TO BE FOUND!” Frantic is the word I’ll use here but any parent who has been in a similar situation knows……. knows there is no word to adequately express the feeling. I was running around the house for the second time and I don’t know why or what made me look down the alley that runs behind our house – Cal was so small, he shouldn’t have been able to traverse our patio steps – but there he was, my little physically advanced boy walking down the alley – headed God knows where, just away from this dump. And there was Brownie – walking circles around him. She was also 2 years-old – about the age a shepherd comes into “protection mode”. She didn’t stop Cal but as he walked forward, she walked around and around and around him. It was the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen.
My love for Brownie begins and ends with her undying devotion to the safety of my children – that is why I wanted her, she has never let me down. About 6 months ago the kids were home alone when my dad walked into the house, now… my dad is here almost daily and Brownie stays with Pop when we go away, Pop is not a stranger… but he caught Brownie off guard, she didn’t have time to register just who was in the house. My dad said it was unbelievable – he got her calmed down quickly once she realized it was him – but there was no question – NOBODY was going to harm my babies. That dog is the most beautiful, sweet, kind hearted, lover of a dog – but first and foremost, she is our protector. I often pet her and tell her “thank you, girl… for protecting the loves of my life.” Then she starts prancing around, steps on my bare foot and blows death into my face until I’m pushed to yelling, telling her she smells bad and to get away from me – I’m not proud of myself, people – she just always has to push it… it’s never enough.
We are… well, we’re asshole dog owners. We know she would never hurt anybody (unless provoked) so we are not exceptionally responsible about keeping her in the yard. Her roaming the neighborhood is almost always the result of me falling for her innocent, “I’m just going to lay here on the step” routine – I go back 5 minutes later and she’s gone. I allow this because I know she’s such a wonderful dog – I’m a complete and utter asshole because, not everybody knows she’s such a wonderful dog. So, there I was – a tad irritated with her (even more so with the kids) when I got a call from my mBFF (the in-town mailman) telling me he got a call from my home mailgirl saying Brownie was not where she should be… Brownie would NEVER hurt anybody without serious provocation but… she is a tad intimidating, so I was worried.
Then I got this picture:
And my heart melted. Cal walked to the pediatrician’s office for his monthly bee shot; Brownie followed him then waited at the door for Cal to come out. This picture brought tears to my eyes… and then… I thought, “HOLY SHIT!!! What if some unsuspecting, little kid opened that friggin door????” Frantic calls ensued. She was back home without incident. So much for enjoying the innocence of the love between a boy and his dog!
Love Brownie!